Orologio astronomico

Yo, Im smitsb, and Im standing right here, letting you stare at this ancient bastard like its some kind of museum piece, but its not a museum piece its a living, breathing, brass-and-gold time bomb thats been ticking since the Renaissance, probably whispering curses to the sky, and youre just standing there with your phone, like Oh, cool clock, while the whole building is basically a walking, talking, 14th-century time-traveling asshole thats still got its damn hour hand and zodiac wheel spinning like its got nothing better to do. This aint just a clock its a medieval goddamn cosmic conspiracy, a self-aware time-keeper that knows youre here to look at it, but it doesnt care. Its got a whole damn zodiac circle glowing like its plotting your death, and its got that upper clock face with Roman numerals that look like they were drawn by a drunk astronomer who was also a little bit evil. You think thats all it is? Nah, the whole tower is basically a vertical time machine with a side of Gothic horror, and Im just chillin here, letting you admire it while its quietly plotting your demise or maybe just your next vacation. Youre not here to see the sky, youre here to be reminded that time is a liar, and this clock? Its the only thing in Prague that actually knows what time it is.

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